Real vs. Virtual Connections

Simon Sinek in his book, “Why Leaders Eat Last”, explains what qualities a good leaders entails and what happens to a corporation and its people when a leader does not create an ideal environment. This environment created by the leader must allow workers to feel safe and the feeling of safety cannot come about without shared trust.

Simon Sinek explains that the first step in creating this environment is creating real connections. Only with these connections can the trust be built. This is something that can often be lost in the workplace environment.  Increasingly these connections have been lost most likely due to the increasing use of technology. Also, there has been a shift in most workplace cultures causing connections to not be as valued. Sinek gives the example of the shift in the culture of the United States Congress. Rather than the two parties priding themselves in working together to accomplish the most now there is a greater desire to just win the a majority vote or to get reelected. Without cooperation and instead just competition congress has been extremely unproductive (Sinek, 2014, p.159). This shift in goals can be attributed to many factors however a major factor is that members of congress nowadays usually do not live in Washington D.C. Instead they now fly into D.C. during the work week from Tuesday to Thursday and then return to their home states. Therefore, the members of congress and their families are not as connected as the used to be in the past. Without the connections its seems as though the members of congress focus on themselves and their parties instead of truly serving the people who have elected them (Sinek, 2014, p. 160).

Similarly, S. Craig Watkins in his piece “The very well connected: Friending, bonding, and community in the digital age” explains this same phenomenon of the importance of real contact. Watkins piece agrees with Sinek’s claims of the important of connections. Watkins explains that people increasingly turn to virtual connections and these are not the same as a real life connection. Our real life connections can translate into the virtual space by “friending” someone who is already a friend. However, he explains that if we make a friend strictly in the virtual space it is not the same sort of a friendship. Watkins gives the example of your car breaking down. You would never call up your virtual friend because you do not actually know who they are or where they are from. The physical connection is always needed for humans to make meaningful connections (Watkins, 2009, p. 54). In the workplace this connection is missing due to increased use of technology or the impossibility of actually knowing everyone.    

Sineck also provides the example of AA meetings where effective connections are present and explains what the experiences of the people in this environment are. AA meeting cannot happen in online chat rooms or via email because the connections needed to beat addiction must be real (Sinek, 2014, p. 204). Real connections result in inclusion and trust which allows for what is known as the circle of safety to be created. With the circle of safety the team can pull together and thrive and survive any external or internal threats.  Sineck provides a compelling and well supported argument with the ideas he presents.

Works Cited:

S. Craig Watkins, "The very well connected: Friending, bonding, and community in the digital age," The Young and the Digital (2009).  

Sinek, S. LEADERS EAT LAST: Why Some Teams Pull Together and Others Don't (2014).